Eugene
Pickering
By
Henry James
CONTENTS:
It was at Homburg, several years ago, before the gaming had been suppressed. The evening was very warm, and all the world was gathered on the terrace of the Kursaal and the esplanade below it to listen to the excellent orchestra; or half the world, rather, for the crowd was equally dense in the gaming-rooms around the tables. Everywhere the crowd was great. The night was perfect, the season was at its height, the open windows of the Kursaal sent long shafts of unnatural light into the dusky woods, and now and then, in the intervals of the music, one might almost hear the clink of the napoleons and the metallic call of the croupiers rise above the watching silence of the saloons. I had been strolling with a friend, and we at last prepared to sit down. Chairs, however, were scarce. I had captured one, but it seemed no easy matter to find a mate for it. I was on the point of giving up in despair, and proposing an adjournment to the silken ottomans of the Kursaal, when I observed a young man lounging back on one of the objects of my quest, with his feet supported on the rounds of another. This was more than his share of luxury, and I promptly approached him. He evidently belonged to the race which has the credit of knowing best, at home and abroad, how to make itself comfortable; but something in his appearance suggested that his present attitude was the result of inadvertence rather than of egotism. He was staring at the conductor of the orchestra and listening intently to the music. His hands were locked round his long legs, and his mouth was half open, with rather a foolish air. “There are so few chairs,” I said, “that I must beg you to surrender this second one.” He started, stared, blushed, pushed the chair away with awkward alacrity, and murmured something about not having noticed that he had it.
“What an odd-looking youth!” said my companion, who had watched me, as I seated myself beside her.
“Yes, he is odd-looking; but what is odder still is that I have seen him before, that his face is familiar to me, and yet that I can’t place him.” The orchestra was playing the Prayer from Der Freischütz, but Weber’s lovely music only deepened the blank of memory. Who the deuce was he? where, when, how, had I known him? It seemed extraordinary that a face should be at once so familiar and so strange. We had our backs turned to him, so that I could not look at him again. When the music ceased we left our places, and I went to consign my friend to her mamma on the terrace. In passing, I saw that my young man had departed; I concluded that he only strikingly resembled some one I knew. But who in the world was it he resembled? The ladies went off to their lodgings, which were near by, and I turned into the gaming-rooms and hovered about the circle at roulette. Gradually I filtered through to the inner edge, near the table, and, looking round, saw my puzzling friend stationed opposite to me. He was watching the game, with his hands in his pockets; but singularly enough, now that I observed him at my leisure, the look of familiarity quite faded from his face. What had made us call his appearance odd was his great length and leanness of limb, his long, white neck, his blue, prominent eyes, and his ingenuous, unconscious absorption in the scene before him. He was not handsome, certainly, but he looked peculiarly amiable and if his overt wonderment savoured a trifle of rurality, it was an agreeable contrast to the hard, inexpressive masks about him. He was the verdant offshoot, I said to myself, of some ancient, rigid stem; he had been brought up in the quietest of homes, and he was having his first glimpse of life. I was curious to see whether he would put anything on the table; he evidently felt the temptation, but he seemed paralysed by chronic embarrassment. He stood gazing at the chinking complexity of losses and gains, shaking his loose gold in his pocket, and every now and then passing his hand nervously over his eyes.
Most of the spectators were too attentive to the play to have many thoughts for each other; but before long I noticed a lady who evidently had an eye for her neighbours as well as for the table. She was seated about half-way between my friend and me, and I presently observed that she was trying to catch his eye. Though at Homburg, as people said, “one could never be sure,” I yet doubted whether this lady were one of those whose especial vocation it was to catch a gentleman’s eye. She was youthful rather than elderly, and pretty rather than plain; indeed, a few minutes later, when I saw her smile, I thought her wonderfully pretty. She had a charming gray eye and a good deal of yellow hair disposed in picturesque disorder; and though her features were meagre and her complexion faded, she gave one a sense of sentimental, artificial gracefulness. She was dressed in white muslin very much puffed and filled, but a trifle the worse for wear, relieved here and there by a pale blue ribbon. I used to flatter myself on guessing at people’s nationality by their faces, and, as a rule, I guessed aright. This faded, crumpled, vaporous beauty, I conceived, was a German—such a German, somehow, as I had seen imagined in literature. Was she not a friend of poets, a correspondent of philosophers, a muse, a priestess of æsthetics—something in the way of a Bettina, a Rahel? My conjectures, however, were speedily merged in wonderment as to what my diffident friend was making of her. She caught his eye at last, and raising an ungloved hand, covered altogether with blue-gemmed rings—turquoises, sapphires, and lapis—she beckoned him to come to her. The gesture was executed with a sort of practised coolness, and accompanied with an appealing smile. He stared a moment, rather blankly, unable to suppose that the invitation was addressed to him; then, as it was immediately repeated with a good deal of intensity, he blushed to the roots of his hair, wavered awkwardly, and at last made his way to the lady’s chair. By the time he reached it he was crimson, and wiping his forehead with his pocket-handkerchief. She tilted back, looked up at him with the same smile, laid two fingers on his sleeve, and said something, interrogatively, to which he replied by a shake of the head. She was asking him, evidently, if he had ever played, and he was saying no. Old players have a fancy that when luck has turned her back on them they can put her into good-humour again by having their stakes placed by a novice. Our young man’s physiognomy had seemed to his new acquaintance to express the perfection of inexperience, and, like a practical woman, she had determined to make him serve her turn. Unlike most of her neighbours, she had no little pile of gold before her, but she drew from her pocket a double napoleon, put it into his hand, and bade him place it on a number of his own choosing. He was evidently filled with a sort of delightful trouble; he enjoyed the adventure, but he shrank from the hazard. I would have staked the coin on its being his companion’s last; for although she still smiled intently as she watched his hesitation, there was anything but indifference in her pale, pretty face. Suddenly, in desperation, he reached over and laid the piece on the table. My attention was diverted at this moment by my having to make way for a lady with a great many flounces, before me, to give up her chair to a rustling friend to whom she had promised it; when I again looked across at the lady in white muslin, she was drawing in a very goodly pile of gold with her little blue-gemmed claw. Good luck and bad, at the Homburg tables, were equally undemonstrative, and this happy adventuress rewarded her young friend for the sacrifice of his innocence with a single, rapid, upward smile. He had innocence enough left, however, to look round the table with a gleeful, conscious laugh, in the midst of which his eyes encountered my own. Then suddenly the familiar look which had vanished from his face flickered up unmistakably; it was the boyish laugh of a boyhood’s friend. Stupid fellow that I was, I had been looking at Eugene Pickering!
Though
I lingered on for some time longer he failed to recognise
me. Recognition, I think, had kindled a smile in my own face; but, less
fortunate than he, I suppose my smile had ceased to be boyish. Now that
luck had faced about again, his companion played for herself—played and
won, hand over hand. At last she seemed disposed to rest on her gains,
and proceeded to bury them in the folds of her muslin.
I
had no intention of letting
“Why, you are not changed so utterly,” I said; “and after all, it’s but fifteen years since you used to do my Latin exercises for me.”
“Not changed, eh?” he answered, still smiling, and yet speaking with a sort of ingenuous dismay.
Then
I remembered that poor
“Yes, we were very good friends,” he said, “and that makes it the stranger I shouldn’t have known you. For you know, as a boy, I never had many friends, nor as a man either. You see,” he added, passing his hand over his eyes, “I am rather dazed, rather bewildered at finding myself for the first time—alone.” And he jerked back his shoulders nervously, and threw up his head, as if to settle himself in an unwonted position. I wondered whether the old nurse with the bushy eyebrows had remained attached to his person up to a recent period, and discovered presently that, virtually at least, she had. We had the whole summer day before us, and we sat down on the grass together and overhauled our old memories. It was as if we had stumbled upon an ancient cupboard in some dusky corner, and rummaged out a heap of childish playthings—tin soldiers and torn story-books, jack-knives and Chinese puzzles. This is what we remembered between us.
He
had made but a short stay at school—not because he was tormented, for he
thought it so fine to be at school at all that he held his tongue at home about
the sufferings incurred through the medicine-bottle, but because his father
thought he was learning bad manners. This he imparted to me in confidence
at the time, and I remember how it increased my oppressive awe of Mr.
Pickering, who had appeared to me in glimpses as a sort of high priest of the
proprieties. Mr. Pickering was a widower—a fact which seemed to
produce in him a sort of preternatural concentration of parental dignity.
He was a majestic man, with a hooked nose, a keen dark eye, very large
whiskers, and notions of his own as to how a boy—or his boy, at any
rate—should be brought up. First and foremost, he was to be a
“gentleman”; which seemed to mean,
chiefly, that he was always to wear a muffler and gloves, and be sent to bed,
after a supper of bread and milk, at eight o’clock. School-life, on
experiment, seemed hostile to these observances, and
I
observed him now with a good deal of interest, for he was a rare
phenomenon—the fruit of a system persistently and uninterruptedly
applied. He struck me, in a fashion, as certain young monks I had seen in
“It’s
nearly fifteen years, as you say,” he began, “since you used to
call me ‘butter-fingers’ for always missing the ball.
That’s a long time to give an account of, and yet they have been, for me,
such eventless, monotonous years, that I could almost tell their history in ten
words. You, I suppose, have had all kinds of adventures and travelled over half the world. I remember you had a
turn for deeds of daring; I used to think you a little Captain Cook in
roundabouts, for climbing the garden fence to get the ball when I had let it
fly over. I climbed no fences then or since. You remember my father,
I suppose, and the great care he took of me? I lost him some five months
ago. From those boyish days up to his death we were always
together. I don’t think that in fifteen years we spent half a dozen
hours apart. We lived in the country, winter and summer, seeing but three
or four people. I had a succession of tutors, and a library to browse
about in; I assure you I am a tremendous scholar. It was a dull life for
a growing boy, and a duller life for a young man grown, but I never knew
it. I was perfectly happy.” He spoke of his father at some
length, and with a respect which I privately declined to emulate. Mr.
Pickering had been, to my sense, a frigid egotist, unable to conceive of any
larger vocation for his son than to strive to reproduce so irreproachable a model.
“I know I have been strangely brought up,” said my friend,
“and that the result is something grotesque; but my education, piece by
piece, in detail, became one of my father’s personal habits, as it
were. He took a fancy to it at first through his intense affection for my
mother and the sort of worship he paid her memory. She died at my birth,
and as I grew up, it seems that I bore an extraordinary likeness to her.
Besides, my father had a great many theories; he prided himself on his conservative
opinions; he thought the usual American laisser-aller
in education was a very vulgar practice, and that children were not to grow up
like dusty thorns by the wayside.” “So you see,”
He
uttered all this with a frank eagerness which increased as he talked, and there
was a singular contrast between the meagre experience
he described and a certain radiant intelligence which I seemed to perceive in
his glance and tone. Evidently he was a clever fellow, and his natural
faculties were excellent. I imagined he had read a great deal, and
recovered, in some degree, in restless intellectual conjecture, the freedom he
was condemned to ignore in practice.
“I have not sailed round the world, as you suppose,” I said, “but I confess I envy you the novelties you are going to behold. Coming to Homburg you have plunged in medias res.”
He
glanced at me to see if my remark contained an allusion, and hesitated a
moment. “Yes, I know it. I came to
“How
long do you expect to be in
“Six months I supposed when I came. But not so long—now!” And he let his eyes wander to the letter again.
“And where shall you go—what shall you do?”
“Everywhere, everything, I should have said yesterday. But now it is different.”
I glanced at the letter—interrogatively, and he gravely picked it up and put it into his pocket. We talked for a while longer, but I saw that he had suddenly become preoccupied; that he was apparently weighing an impulse to break some last barrier of reserve. At last he suddenly laid his hand on my arm, looked at me a moment appealingly, and cried, “Upon my word, I should like to tell you everything!”
“Tell me everything, by all means,” I answered, smiling. “I desire nothing better than to lie here in the shade and hear everything.”
“Ah, but the question is, will you understand it? No matter; you think me a queer fellow already. It’s not easy, either, to tell you what I feel—not easy for so queer a fellow as I to tell you in how many ways he is queer!” He got up and walked away a moment, passing his hand over his eyes, then came back rapidly and flung himself on the grass again. “I said just now I always supposed I was happy; it’s true; but now that my eyes are open, I see I was only stultified. I was like a poodle-dog that is led about by a blue ribbon, and scoured and combed and fed on slops. It was not life; life is learning to know one’s self, and in that sense I have lived more in the past six weeks than in all the years that preceded them. I am filled with this feverish sense of liberation; it keeps rising to my head like the fumes of strong wine. I find I am an active, sentient, intelligent creature, with desires, with passions, with possible convictions—even with what I never dreamed of, a possible will of my own! I find there is a world to know, a life to lead, men and women to form a thousand relations with. It all lies there like a great surging sea, where we must plunge and dive and feel the breeze and breast the waves. I stand shivering here on the brink, staring, longing, wondering, charmed by the smell of the brine and yet afraid of the water. The world beckons and smiles and calls, but a nameless influence from the past, that I can neither wholly obey nor wholly resist, seems to hold me back. I am full of impulses, but, somehow, I am not full of strength. Life seems inspiring at certain moments, but it seems terrible and unsafe; and I ask myself why I should wantonly measure myself with merciless forces, when I have learned so well how to stand aside and let them pass. Why shouldn’t I turn my back upon it all and go home to—what awaits me?—to that sightless, soundless country life, and long days spent among old books? But if a man is weak, he doesn’t want to assent beforehand to his weakness; he wants to taste whatever sweetness there may be in paying for the knowledge. So it is that it comes back—this irresistible impulse to take my plunge—to let myself swing, to go where liberty leads me.” He paused a moment, fixing me with his excited eyes, and perhaps perceived in my own an irrepressible smile at his perplexity. “‘Swing ahead, in Heaven’s name,’ you want to say, ‘and much good may it do you.’ I don’t know whether you are laughing at my scruples or at what possibly strikes you as my depravity. I doubt,” he went on gravely, “whether I have an inclination toward wrong-doing; if I have, I am sure I shall not prosper in it. I honestly believe I may safely take out a license to amuse myself. But it isn’t that I think of, any more than I dream of, playing with suffering. Pleasure and pain are empty words to me; what I long for is knowledge—some other knowledge than comes to us in formal, colourless, impersonal precept. You would understand all this better if you could breathe for an hour the musty in-door atmosphere in which I have always lived. To break a window and let in light and air—I feel as if at last I must act!”
“Act, by all means, now and always, when you have a chance,” I answered. “But don’t take things too hard, now or ever. Your long confinement makes you think the world better worth knowing than you are likely to find it. A man with as good a head and heart as yours has a very ample world within himself, and I am no believer in art for art, nor in what’s called ‘life’ for life’s sake. Nevertheless, take your plunge, and come and tell me whether you have found the pearl of wisdom.” He frowned a little, as if he thought my sympathy a trifle meagre. I shook him by the hand and laughed. “The pearl of wisdom,” I cried, “is love; honest love in the most convenient concentration of experience! I advise you to fall in love.” He gave me no smile in response, but drew from his pocket the letter of which I have spoken, held it up, and shook it solemnly. “What is it?” I asked.
“It is my sentence!”
“Not of death, I hope!”
“Of marriage.”
“With whom?”
“With a person I don’t love.”
This was serious. I stopped smiling, and begged him to explain.
“It
is the singular part of my story,” he said at last. “It will
remind you of an old-fashioned romance. Such as I sit here, talking in
this wild way, and tossing off provocations to destiny, my destiny is settled
and sealed. I am engaged, I am given in marriage. It’s a
bequest of the past—the past I had no hand in! The marriage was
arranged by my father, years ago, when I was a boy. The young
girl’s father was his particular friend; he was also a widower, and was
bringing up his daughter, on his side, in the same severe seclusion in which I
was spending my days. To this day I am unacquainted with the origin of
the bond of union between our respective progenitors. Mr. Vernor was largely engaged in business, and I imagine that
once upon a time he found himself in a financial strait and was helped through
it by my father’s coming forward with a heavy loan, on which, in his
situation, he could offer no security but his word. Of this my father was
quite capable. He was a man of dogmas, and he was sure to have a rule of
life—as clear as if it had been written out in his beautiful copper-plate
hand—adapted to the conduct of a gentleman toward a friend in pecuniary
embarrassment. What is more, he was sure to adhere to it. Mr. Vernor, I believe, got on his feet, paid his debt, and
vowed my father an eternal gratitude. His little daughter was the apple
of his eye, and he pledged himself to bring her up to be the wife of his
benefactor’s son. So our fate was fixed, parentally, and we have
been educated for each other. I have not seen my betrothed since she was
a very plain-faced little girl in a sticky pinafore, hugging a one-armed
doll—of the male sex, I believe—as big as herself.
Mr. Vernor is in what is called the Eastern trade,
and has been living these many years at
He
related all this calmly enough, without the accent of complaint, drily rather and doggedly, as if he were weary of thinking
of it. “It’s a romance, indeed, for these dull days,” I
said, “and I heartily congratulate you. It’s not every young
man who finds, on reaching the marrying age, a wife kept in a box of
rose-leaves for him. A thousand to one Miss Vernor
is charming; I wonder you don’t post off to
“You are joking,” he answered, with a wounded air, “and I am terribly serious. Let me tell you the rest. I never suspected this superior conspiracy till something less than a year ago. My father, wishing to provide against his death, informed me of it very solemnly. I was neither elated nor depressed; I received it, as I remember, with a sort of emotion which varied only in degree from that with which I could have hailed the announcement that he had ordered me a set of new shirts. I supposed that was the way that all marriages were made; I had heard of their being made in heaven, and what was my father but a divinity? Novels and poems, indeed, talked about falling in love; but novels and poems were one thing and life was another. A short time afterwards he introduced me to a photograph of my predestined, who has a pretty, but an extremely inanimate, face. After this his health failed rapidly. One night I was sitting, as I habitually sat for hours, in his dimly-lighted room, near his bed, to which he had been confined for a week. He had not spoken for some time, and I supposed he was asleep; but happening to look at him I saw his eyes wide open, and fixed on me strangely. He was smiling benignantly, intensely, and in a moment he beckoned to me. Then, on my going to him—‘I feel that I shall not last long,’ he said; ‘but I am willing to die when I think how comfortably I have arranged your future.’ He was talking of death, and anything but grief at that moment was doubtless impious and monstrous; but there came into my heart for the first time a throbbing sense of being over-governed. I said nothing, and he thought my silence was all sorrow. ‘I shall not live to see you married,’ he went on, ‘but since the foundation is laid, that little signifies; it would be a selfish pleasure, and I have never thought of myself but in you. To foresee your future, in its main outline, to know to a certainty that you will be safely domiciled here, with a wife approved by my judgment, cultivating the moral fruit of which I have sown the seed—this will content me. But, my son, I wish to clear this bright vision from the shadow of a doubt. I believe in your docility; I believe I may trust the salutary force of your respect for my memory. But I must remember that when I am removed you will stand here alone, face to face with a hundred nameless temptations to perversity. The fumes of unrighteous pride may rise into your brain and tempt you, in the interest of a vulgar theory which it will call your independence, to shatter the edifice I have so laboriously constructed. So I must ask you for a promise—the solemn promise you owe my condition.’ And he grasped my hand. ‘You will follow the path I have marked; you will be faithful to the young girl whom an influence as devoted as that which has governed your own young life has moulded into everything amiable; you will marry Isabel Vernor.’ This was pretty ‘steep,’ as we used to say at school. I was frightened; I drew away my hand and asked to be trusted without any such terrible vow. My reluctance startled my father into a suspicion that the vulgar theory of independence had already been whispering to me. He sat up in his bed and looked at me with eyes which seemed to foresee a lifetime of odious ingratitude. I felt the reproach; I feel it now. I promised! And even now I don’t regret my promise nor complain of my father’s tenacity. I feel, somehow, as if the seeds of ultimate repose had been sown in those unsuspecting years—as if after many days I might gather the mellow fruit. But after many days! I will keep my promise, I will obey; but I want to live first!”
“My dear fellow, you are living now. All this passionate consciousness of your situation is a very ardent life. I wish I could say as much for my own.”
“I want to forget my situation. I want to spend three months without thinking of the past or the future, grasping whatever the present offers me. Yesterday I thought I was in a fair way to sail with the tide. But this morning comes this memento!” And he held up his letter again.
“What is it?”
“A letter from
“I see you have not yet broken the seal.”
“No; nor do I mean to, for the present. It contains bad news.”
“What do you call bad news?”
“News that I am expected in
“Is not this pure conjecture?”
“Conjecture, possibly, but safe conjecture. As soon as I looked at the letter something smote me at the heart. Look at the device on the seal, and I am sure you will find it’s Tarry not!” And he flung the letter on the grass.
“Upon my word, you had better open it,” I said.
“If
I were to open it and read my summons, do you know what I should do? I
should march home and ask the Oberkellner how one
gets to
“In your place,” I said, “curiosity would make me open it.”
He shook his head. “I have no curiosity! For a long time now the idea of my marriage has ceased to be a novelty, and I have contemplated it mentally in every possible light. I fear nothing from that side, but I do fear something from conscience. I want my hands tied. Will you do me a favour? Pick up the letter, put it into your pocket, and keep it till I ask you for it. When I do, you may know that I am at my rope’s end.”
I took the letter, smiling. “And how long is your rope to be? The Homburg season doesn’t last for ever.”
“Does it last a month? Let that be my season! A month hence you will give it back to me.”
“To-morrow if you say so. Meanwhile, let it rest in peace!” And I consigned it to the most sacred interstice of my pocket-book. To say that I was disposed to humour the poor fellow would seem to be saying that I thought his request fantastic. It was his situation, by no fault of his own, that was fantastic, and he was only trying to be natural. He watched me put away the letter, and when it had disappeared gave a soft sigh of relief. The sigh was natural, and yet it set me thinking. His general recoil from an immediate responsibility imposed by others might be wholesome enough; but if there was an old grievance on one side, was there not possibly a new-born delusion on the other? It would be unkind to withhold a reflection that might serve as a warning; so I told him, abruptly, that I had been an undiscovered spectator, the night before, of his exploits at roulette.
He blushed deeply, but he met my eyes with the same clear good-humour.
“Ah, then, you saw that wonderful lady?”
“Wonderful she was indeed. I saw her afterwards, too, sitting on the terrace in the starlight. I imagine she was not alone.”
“No, indeed, I was with her—for nearly an hour. Then I walked home with her.”
“Ah! And did you go in?”
“No, she said it was too late to ask me; though she remarked that in a general way she did not stand upon ceremony.”
“She did herself injustice. When it came to losing your money for you, she made you insist.”
“Ah,
you noticed that too?” cried
“In other words, she is a lady with no reputation to lose!”
“Of some—of those who are found out.”
“Well,” he said, still smiling, “I have not yet found out Madame Blumenthal.”
“If that’s her name, I suppose she’s German.”
“Yes; but she speaks English so well that you wouldn’t know it. She is very clever. Her husband is dead.”
I
laughed involuntarily at the conjunction of these facts, and
He seemed to ponder my question, unshrinkingly. “I think not,” he said, at last. “I have had the desire for three months; I have known Madame Blumenthal for less than twenty-four hours.”
“Very true. But when you found this letter of yours on your place at breakfast, did you seem for a moment to see Madame Blumenthal sitting opposite?”
“Opposite?”
“Opposite, my dear fellow, or anywhere in the neighbourhood. In a word, does she interest you?”
“Very much!” he cried, joyously.
“Amen!” I answered, jumping up with a laugh. “And now, if we are to see the world in a month, there is no time to lose. Let us begin with the Hardtwald.”
“Gracious powers!” I said to myself; “what an enchanting thing is innocence!”
“That
portrait was taken a year and a half ago,” said
“Not much, I hope,” I said, as I gave it back. “She is very sweet!”
“Yes, poor girl, she is very sweet—no doubt!” And he put the thing away without looking at it.
We were silent for some moments. At last, abruptly—“My dear fellow,” I said, “I should take some satisfaction in seeing you immediately leave Homburg.”
“Immediately?”
“To-day—as soon as you can get ready.”
He looked at me, surprised, and little by little he blushed. “There is something I have not told you,” he said; “something that your saying that Madame Blumenthal has no reputation to lose has made me half afraid to tell you.”
“I think I can guess it. Madame Blumenthal has asked you to come and play her game for her again.”
“Not
at all!” cried
“Ah, then,” I said, very gravely, “of course you can’t leave Homburg.”
He answered nothing, but looked askance at me, as if he were expecting me to laugh. “Urge it strongly,” he said in a moment. “Say it’s my duty—that I must.”
I didn’t quite understand him, but, feathering the shaft with a harmless expletive, I told him that unless he followed my advice I would never speak to him again.
He got up, stood before me, and struck the ground with his stick. “Good!” he cried; “I wanted an occasion to break a rule—to leap a barrier. Here it is. I stay!”
I made him a mock bow for his energy. “That’s very fine,” I said; “but now, to put you in a proper mood for Madame Blumenthal’s tea, we will go and listen to the band play Schubert under the lindens.” And we walked back through the woods.
I
went to see
“And who is your teacher?” I asked, glancing at the book.
He rather avoided meeting my eye, as he answered, after an instant’s delay, “Madame Blumenthal.”
“Indeed! Has she written a grammar?”
“It’s not a grammar; it’s a tragedy.” And he handed me the book.
I opened it, and beheld, in delicate type, with a very large margin, an Historisches Trauerspiel in five acts, entitled “Cleopatra.” There were a great many marginal corrections and annotations, apparently from the author’s hand; the speeches were very long, and there was an inordinate number of soliloquies by the heroine. One of them, I remember, towards the end of the play, began in this fashion—
“What, after all, is life but sensation, and sensation but deception?—reality that pales before the light of one’s dreams as Octavia’s dull beauty fades beside mine? But let me believe in some intenser bliss, and seek it in the arms of death!”
“It seems decidedly passionate,” I said. “Has the tragedy ever been acted?”
“Never
in public; but Madame Blumenthal tells me that she had it played at her own
house in
“I
don’t know whether she is eccentric or not,” he said; “to me
every one seems eccentric, and it’s not for me, yet a while, to measure
people by my narrow precedents. I never saw a gaming table in my life
before, and supposed that a gambler was of necessity some dusky villain with an
evil eye. In
“Madame Blumenthal,” I said, smiling, “might be the loveliest woman in the world, and you the object of her choicest favours, and yet what I should most envy you would be, not your peerless friend, but your beautiful imagination.”
“That’s
a polite way of calling me a fool,” said
“You will make the journey fast if you travel by express trains. But pray tell me, have you ventured to intimate to Madame Blumenthal your high opinion of her?”
“I
don’t know what I may have said. She listens even better than she
talks, and I think it possible I may have made her listen to a great deal of
nonsense. For after the first few words I exchanged with her I was
conscious of an extraordinary evaporation of all my old diffidence. I
have, in truth, I suppose,” he added in a moment, “owing to my
peculiar circumstances, a great accumulated fund of unuttered things of all
sorts to get rid of. Last evening, sitting there before that charming
woman, they came swarming to my lips. Very likely I poured them all
out. I have a sense of having enshrouded myself in a sort of mist of
talk, and of seeing her lovely eyes shining through it opposite to me, like
fog-lamps at sea.” And here, if I remember rightly,
“Madame Blumenthal, on the contrary,” I surmised, “entered into your situation with warmth.”
“Exactly so—the greatest! She has felt and suffered, and now she understands!”
“She told you, I imagine, that she understood you as if she had made you, and she offered to be your guide, philosopher, and friend.”
“She
spoke to me,”
“Which you as formally accepted?”
“To
you the scene sounds absurd, I suppose, but allow me to say I don’t
care!”
“Meanwhile she had dropped her tragedy into your pocket!”
“Not at all. I had seen it on the table before she came in. Afterwards she kindly offered to read German aloud with me, for the accent, two or three times a week. ‘What shall we begin with?’ she asked. ‘With this!’ I said, and held up the book. And she let me take it to look it over.”
I
was neither a cynic nor a satirist, but even if I had been, I might have been
disarmed by
Madame Blumenthal seemed, for the time, to have abjured the Kursaal, and I never caught a glimpse of her. Her young friend, apparently, was an interesting study, and the studious mind prefers seclusion.
She
reappeared, however, at last, one evening at the opera, where from my chair I
perceived her in a box, looking extremely pretty. Adelina
Patti was singing, and after the rising of the curtain I was occupied with the
stage; but on looking round when it fell for the entr’acte, I saw
that the authoress of “Cleopatra” had been joined by her young
admirer. He was sitting a little behind her, leaning forward, looking
over her shoulder and listening, while she, slowly moving her fan to and fro
and letting her eye wander over the house, was apparently talking of this
person and that. No doubt she was saying sharp things; but
“Do tell me,” I said, as we stood looking round the house, “who and what is the lady in white, with the young man sitting behind her.”
“Who?” he answered, dropping his glass. “Madame Blumenthal! What! It would take long to say. Be introduced; it’s easily done; you will find her charming. Then, after a week, you will tell me what she is.”
“Perhaps I should not. My friend there has known her a week, and I don’t think he is yet able to give a coherent account of her.”
He raised his glass again, and after looking a while, “I am afraid your friend is a little—what do you call it?—a little ‘soft.’ Poor fellow! he’s not the first. I have never known this lady that she has not had some eligible youth hovering about in some such attitude as that, undergoing the softening process. She looks wonderfully well, from here. It’s extraordinary how those women last!”
“You don’t mean, I take it, when you talk about ‘those women,’ that Madame Blumenthal is not embalmed, for duration, in a certain infusion of respectability?”
“Yes
and no. The atmosphere that surrounds her is entirely of her own
making. There is no reason in her antecedents that people should drop
their voice when they speak of her. But some women are never at their
ease till they have given some damnable twist or other to their position before
the world. The attitude of upright virtue is unbecoming, like sitting too
straight in a fauteuil. Don’t ask me for opinions, however; content
yourself with a few facts and with an anecdote. Madame Blumenthal is
Prussian, and very well born. I remember her mother,
an old Westphalian Gräfin,
with principles marshalled out like
“You are reversing your promise,” I said, “and giving me an opinion, but not an anecdote.”
“This
is my anecdote. A year ago a friend of mine made her acquaintance in
“By Jove, it’s a striking story,” I said. “But the question is, what does it prove?”
“Several things. First (what I was careful not to tell my friend), that Madame Blumenthal cared for him a trifle more than he supposed; second, that he cares for her more than ever; third, that the performance was a master-stroke, and that her allowing him to force an interview upon her again is only a question of time.”
“And last?” I asked.
“This is another anecdote. The other day, Unter den Linden, I saw on a bookseller’s counter a little pink-covered romance—‘Sophronia,’ by Madame Blumenthal. Glancing through it, I observed an extraordinary abuse of asterisks; every two or three pages the narrative was adorned with a portentous blank, crossed with a row of stars.”
“Well, but poor Clorinda?” I objected, as Niedermeyer paused.
“Sophronia, my dear fellow, is simply Clorinda renamed by the baptism of fire. The fair author came back, of course, and found Clorinda tumbled upon the floor, a good deal scorched, but, on the whole, more frightened than hurt. She picks her up, brushes her off, and sends her to the printer. Wherever the flames had burnt a hole she swings a constellation! But if the major is prepared to drop a penitent tear over the ashes of Clorinda, I shall not whisper to him that the urn is empty.”
Even
Adelina Patti’s singing, for the next
half-hour, but half availed to divert me from my quickened curiosity to behold
Madame Blumenthal face to face. As soon as the curtain had fallen again I
repaired to her box and was ushered in by
He
blushed to his eyes, and I repented. She suddenly began to laugh; it was
then I observed how sweet her voice was in laughter. We talked after this
of various matters, and in a little while I complimented her on her excellent
English, and asked if she had learnt it in
“Heaven forbid!” she cried. “I have never been there and wish never to go. I should never get on with the—” I wondered what she was going to say; the fogs, the smoke, or whist with sixpenny stakes?—“I should never get on,” she said, “with the aristocracy! I am a fierce democrat—I am not ashamed of it. I hold opinions which would make my ancestors turn in their graves. I was born in the lap of feudalism. I am a daughter of the crusaders. But I am a revolutionist! I have a passion for freedom—my idea of happiness is to die on a great barricade! It’s to your great country I should like to go. I should like to see the wonderful spectacle of a great people free to do everything it chooses, and yet never doing anything wrong!”
I
replied, modestly, that, after all, both our freedom and our good conduct had
their limits, and she turned quickly about and shook her fan with a dramatic
gesture at
Glancing
at
I promised to come and compare notes with her, and we bade her farewell at her carriage door. Pickering and I remained a while, walking up and down the long glazed gallery of the Kursaal. I had not taken many steps before I became aware that I was beside a man in the very extremity of love. “Isn’t she wonderful?” he asked, with an implicit confidence in my sympathy which it cost me some ingenuity to elude. If he were really in love, well and good! For although, now that I had seen her, I stood ready to confess to large possibilities of fascination on Madame Blumenthal’s part, and even to certain possibilities of sincerity of which my appreciation was vague, yet it seemed to me less ominous that he should be simply smitten than that his admiration should pique itself on being discriminating. It was on his fundamental simplicity that I counted for a happy termination of his experiment, and the former of these alternatives seemed to me the simpler. I resolved to hold my tongue and let him run his course. He had a great deal to say about his happiness, about the days passing like hours, the hours like minutes, and about Madame Blumenthal being a “revelation.” “She was nothing to-night,” he said; “nothing to what she sometimes is in the way of brilliancy—in the way of repartee. If you could only hear her when she tells her adventures!”
“Adventures?” I inquired. “Has she had adventures?”
“Of
the most wonderful sort!” cried
I could only lift my eyebrows, but I desired to know before we separated what he had done with that troublesome conscience of his. “I suppose you know, my dear fellow,” I said, “that you are simply in love. That’s what they happen to call your state of mind.”
He replied with a brightening eye, as if he were delighted to hear it—“So Madame Blumenthal told me only this morning!” And seeing, I suppose, that I was slightly puzzled, “I went to drive with her,” he continued; “we drove to Königstein, to see the old castle. We scrambled up into the heart of the ruin and sat for an hour in one of the crumbling old courts. Something in the solemn stillness of the place unloosed my tongue; and while she sat on an ivied stone, on the edge of the plunging wall, I stood there and made a speech. She listened to me, looking at me, breaking off little bits of stone and letting them drop down into the valley. At last she got up and nodded at me two or three times silently, with a smile, as if she were applauding me for a solo on the violin. ‘You are in love,’ she said. ‘It’s a perfect case!’ And for some time she said nothing more. But before we left the place she told me that she owed me an answer to my speech. She thanked me heartily, but she was afraid that if she took me at my word she would be taking advantage of my inexperience. I had known few women; I was too easily pleased; I thought her better than she really was. She had great faults; I must know her longer and find them out; I must compare her with other women—women younger, simpler, more innocent, more ignorant; and then if I still did her the honour to think well of her, she would listen to me again. I told her that I was not afraid of preferring any woman in the world to her, and then she repeated, ‘Happy man, happy man! you are in love, you are in love!’”
I
called upon Madame Blumenthal a couple of days later, in some agitation of
thought. It has been proved that there are, here and there, in the world,
such people as sincere impostors; certain characters who cultivate fictitious
emotions in perfect good faith. Even if this clever lady enjoyed poor