RODERICK
by
Henry James
Contents:
CHAPTER XII. The Princess Casamassima
Mallet had
made his arrangements to sail for
This time,
however, he presented himself bravely enough; for in the way of activity it was
something definite, at least, to be going to Europe and to be meaning to spend
the winter in
For the
present, after tea, as they sat on the rose-framed porch, while Rowland held
his younger cousin between his knees, and she, enjoying her situation, listened
timorously for the stroke of bedtime, Cecilia insisted on talking more about
her visitor than about herself.
"What
is it you mean to do in Europe?" she asked, lightly, giving a turn to the
frill of her sleeve—just such a turn as seemed to Mallet to bring out all
the latent difficulties of the question.
"Why,
very much what I do here," he answered. "No great harm."
"Is
it true," Cecilia asked, "that here you do no great harm? Is not a
man like you doing harm when he is not doing positive good?"
"Your
compliment is ambiguous," said Rowland.
"No,"
answered the widow, "you know what I think of you. You have a particular
aptitude for beneficence. You have it in the first place in your character. You
are a benevolent person. Ask Bessie if you don't hold her more gently and
comfortably than any of her other admirers."
"He
holds me more comfortably than Mr. Hudson," Bessie declared, roundly.
Rowland,
not knowing Mr. Hudson, could but half appreciate the eulogy, and Cecilia went
on to develop her idea. "Your circumstances, in the second place, suggest
the idea of social usefulness. You are intelligent, you are well-informed, and
your charity, if one may call it charity, would be discriminating. You are rich
and unoccupied, so that it might be abundant. Therefore, I say, you are a
person to do something on a large scale. Bestir yourself, dear Rowland, or we
may be taught to think that virtue herself is setting a bad example."
"Heaven
forbid," cried Rowland, "that I should set the examples of virtue! I
am quite willing to follow them, however, and if I don't do something on the
grand scale, it is that my genius is altogether imitative, and that I have not
recently encountered any very striking models of grandeur. Pray, what shall I
do? Found an orphan asylum, or build a dormitory for
"Well,
I give you till forty," said Cecilia. "It 's only a word to the wise,
a notification that you are expected not to run your course without having done
something handsome for your fellow-men."
Nine
o'clock sounded, and Bessie, with each stroke, courted a closer embrace. But a
single winged word from her mother overleaped her successive intrenchments. She
turned and kissed her cousin, and deposited an irrepressible tear on his
moustache. Then she went and said her prayers to her mother: it was evident she
was being admirably brought up. Rowland, with the permission of his hostess,
lighted a cigar and puffed it awhile in silence. Cecilia's interest in his
career seemed very agreeable. That Mallet was without vanity I by no means
intend to affirm; but there had been times when, seeing him accept, hardly less
deferentially, advice even more peremptory than the widow's, you might have
asked yourself what had become of his vanity. Now, in the sweet-smelling
starlight, he felt gently wooed to egotism. There was a project connected with
his going abroad which it was on his tongue's end to communicate. It had no
relation to hospitals or dormitories, and yet it would have sounded very
generous. But it was not because it would have sounded generous that poor
Mallet at last puffed it away in the fumes of his cigar. Useful though it might
be, it expressed most imperfectly the young man's own personal conception of
usefulness. He was extremely fond of all the arts, and he had an almost
passionate enjoyment of pictures. He had seen many, and he judged them
sagaciously. It had occurred to him some time before that it would be the work
of a good citizen to go abroad and with all expedition and secrecy purchase
certain valuable specimens of the Dutch and Italian schools as to which he had
received private proposals, and then present his treasures out of hand to an
American city, not unknown to aesthetic fame, in which at that time there
prevailed a good deal of fruitless aspiration toward an art-museum. He had seen
himself in imagination, more than once, in some mouldy old saloon of a
Florentine palace, turning toward the deep embrasure of the window some
scarcely-faded Ghirlandaio or Botticelli, while a host in reduced circumstances
pointed out the lovely drawing of a hand. But he imparted none of these visions
to Cecilia, and he suddenly swept them away with the declaration that he was of
course an idle, useless creature, and that he would probably be even more so in
Europe than at home. "The only thing is," he said, "that there I
shall seem to be doing something. I shall be better entertained, and shall be
therefore, I suppose, in a better humor with life. You may say that that is
just the humor a useless man should keep out of. He should cultivate
discontentment. I did a good many things when I was in Europe before, but I did
not spend a winter in
"I
should have said, my dear Rowland," said Cecilia, with a laugh, "that
your nerves were tough, that your eggs were hard!"
"That
being stupid, you mean, I might be happy? Upon my word I am not. I am clever
enough to want more than I 've got. I am tired of myself, my own thoughts, my
own affairs, my own eternal company. True happiness, we are told, consists in
getting out of one's self; but the point is not only to get out—you must
stay out; and to stay out you must have some absorbing errand. Unfortunately, I
've got no errand, and nobody will trust me with one. I want to care for
something, or for some one. And I want to care with a certain ardor; even, if
you can believe it, with a certain passion. I can't just now feel ardent and
passionate about a hospital or a dormitory. Do you know I sometimes think that
I 'm a man of genius, half finished? The genius has been left out, the faculty
of expression is wanting; but the need for expression remains, and I spend my
days groping for the latch of a closed door."
"What
an immense number of words," said Cecilia after a pause, "to say you
want to fall in love! I 've no doubt you have as good a genius for that as any
one, if you would only trust it."
"Of
course I 've thought of that, and I assure you I hold myself ready. But,
evidently, I 'm not inflammable. Is there in
"Of
the graces?" said Cecilia, raising her eyebrows and suppressing too
distinct a consciousness of being herself a rosy embodiment of several.
"The household virtues are better represented. There are some excellent
girls, and there are two or three very pretty ones. I will have them here, one
by one, to tea, if you like."
"I
should particularly like it; especially as I should give you a chance to see,
by the profundity of my attention, that if I am not happy, it 's not for want
of taking pains."
Cecilia
was silent a moment; and then, "On the whole," she resumed, "I
don't think there are any worth asking. There are none so very pretty, none so
very pleasing."
"Are
you very sure?" asked the young man, rising and throwing away his
cigar-end.
"Upon
my word," cried Cecilia, "one would suppose I wished to keep you for
myself. Of course I am sure! But as the penalty of your insinuations, I shall
invite the plainest and prosiest damsel that can be found, and leave you alone
with her."
Rowland
smiled. "Even against her," he said, "I should be sorry to
conclude until I had given her my respectful attention."
This
little profession of ideal chivalry (which closed the conversation) was not
quite so fanciful on Mallet's lips as it would have been on those of many
another man; as a rapid glance at his antecedents may help to make the reader
perceive. His life had been a singular mixture of the rough and the smooth. He
had sprung from a rigid Puritan stock, and had been brought up to think much
more intently of the duties of this life than of its privileges and pleasures.
His progenitors had submitted in the matter of dogmatic theology to the
relaxing influences of recent years; but if Rowland's youthful consciousness
was not chilled by the menace of long punishment for brief transgression, he
had at least been made to feel that there ran through all things a strain of
right and of wrong, as different, after all, in their complexions, as the
texture, to the spiritual sense, of Sundays and week-days. His father was a
chip of the primal Puritan block, a man with an icy smile and a stony frown. He
had always bestowed on his son, on principle, more frowns than smiles, and if
the lad had not been turned to stone himself, it was because nature had blessed
him, inwardly, with a well of vivifying waters. Mrs. Mallet had been a Miss
Rowland, the daughter of a retired sea-captain, once famous on the ships that
sailed from
Cecilia's
blooming garden and shady porch had seemed so friendly to repose and a cigar,
that she reproached him the next morning with indifference to her little
parlor, not less, in its way, a monument to her ingenious taste. "And by
the way," she added as he followed her in, "if I refused last night
to show you a pretty girl, I can at least show you a pretty boy."
She threw
open a window and pointed to a statuette which occupied the place of honor
among the ornaments of the room. Rowland looked at it a moment and then turned
to her with an exclamation of surprise. She gave him a rapid glance, perceived
that her statuette was of altogether exceptional merit, and then smiled,
knowingly, as if this had long been an agreeable certainty.
"Who
did it? where did you get it?" Rowland demanded.
"Oh,"
said Cecilia, adjusting the light, "it 's a little thing of Mr.
Hudson's."
"And
who the deuce is Mr. Hudson?" asked Rowland. But he was absorbed; he lost
her immediate reply. The statuette, in bronze, something less than two feet
high, represented a naked youth drinking from a gourd. The attitude was
perfectly simple. The lad was squarely planted on his feet, with his legs a
little apart; his back was slightly hollowed, his head thrown back, and both
hands raised to support the rustic cup. There was a loosened fillet of wild
flowers about his head, and his eyes, under their drooped lids, looked straight
into the cup. On the base was scratched the Greek word ;aa;gD;gi;gc;ga, Thirst.
The figure might have been some beautiful youth of ancient fable,—Hylas
or Narcissus, Paris or Endymion. Its beauty was the beauty of natural movement;
nothing had been sought to be represented but the perfection of an attitude.
This had been most attentively studied, and it was exquisitely rendered.
Rowland demanded more light, dropped his head on this side and that, uttered
vague exclamations. He said to himself, as he had said more than once in the
Louvre and the
"A
young man of this place," said Cecilia.
"A
young man? How old?"
"I
suppose he is three or four and twenty."
"Of
this place, you say—of
"He
lives here, but he comes from
"Is
he a sculptor by profession?"
"He
's a law-student."
Rowland
burst out laughing. "He has found something in Blackstone that I never
did. He makes statues then simply for his pleasure?"
Cecilia,
with a smile, gave a little toss of her head. "For mine!"
"I
congratulate you," said Rowland. "I wonder whether he could be
induced to do anything for me?"
"This
was a matter of friendship. I saw the figure when he had modeled it in clay,
and of course greatly admired it. He said nothing at the time, but a week ago,
on my birthday, he arrived in a buggy, with this. He had had it cast at the
foundry at
"Upon
my word," said Mallet, "he does things handsomely!" And he fell
to admiring the statue again.
"So
then," said Cecilia, "it 's very remarkable?"
"Why,
my dear cousin," Rowland answered, "Mr. Hudson, of
"A
great friend?" and Cecilia hesitated. "I regard him as a child!"
"Well,"
said Rowland, "he 's a very clever child. Tell me something about him: I
should like to see him."
Cecilia
was obliged to go to her daughter's music-lesson, but she assured Rowland that
she would arrange for him a meeting with the young sculptor. He was a frequent
visitor, and as he had not called for some days it was likely he would come
that evening. Rowland, left alone, examined the statuette at his leisure, and
returned more than once during the day to take another look at it. He
discovered its weak points, but it wore well. It had the stamp of genius.
Rowland envied the happy youth who, in a
In the
evening, as he was smoking his cigar on the veranda, a light, quick step
pressed the gravel of the garden path, and in a moment a young man made his bow
to Cecilia. It was rather a nod than a bow, and indicated either that he was an
old friend, or that he was scantily versed in the usual social forms. Cecilia,
who was sitting near the steps, pointed to a neighboring chair, but the young
man seated himself abruptly on the floor at her feet, began to fan himself
vigorously with his hat, and broke out into a lively objurgation upon the hot
weather. "I 'm dripping wet!" he said, without ceremony.
"You
walk too fast," said Cecilia. "You do everything too fast."
"I
know it, I know it!" he cried, passing his hand through his abundant dark
hair and making it stand out in a picturesque shock. "I can't be slow if I
try. There 's something inside of me that drives me. A restless fiend!"
Cecilia
gave a light laugh, and Rowland leaned forward in his hammock. He had placed
himself in it at Bessie's request, and was playing that he was her baby and
that she was rocking him to sleep. She sat beside him, swinging the hammock to
and fro, and singing a lullaby. When he raised himself she pushed him back and
said that the baby must finish its nap. "But I want to see the gentleman
with the fiend inside of him," said Rowland.
"What
is a fiend?" Bessie demanded. "It 's only Mr. Hudson."
"Very
well, I want to see him."
"Oh,
never mind him!" said Bessie, with the brevity of contempt.
"You
speak as if you did n't like him."
"I
don't!" Bessie affirmed, and put Rowland to bed again.
The
hammock was swung at the end of the veranda, in the thickest shade of the
vines, and this fragment of dialogue had passed unnoticed. Rowland submitted a
while longer to be cradled, and contented himself with listening to Mr.
Hudson's voice. It was a soft and not altogether masculine organ, and was
pitched on this occasion in a somewhat plaintive and pettish key. The young
man's mood seemed fretful; he complained of the heat, of the dust, of a shoe
that hurt him, of having gone on an errand a mile to the other side of the town
and found the person he was in search of had left
"Won't
you have a cup of tea?" Cecilia asked. "Perhaps that will restore
your equanimity."
"Aye,
by keeping me awake all night!" said
"Your
mother is well, I hope."
"Oh,
she 's as usual."
"And
Miss Garland?"
"She
's as usual, too. Every one, everything, is as usual. Nothing ever happens, in
this benighted town."
"I
beg your pardon; things do happen, sometimes," said Cecilia. "Here is
a dear cousin of mine arrived on purpose to congratulate you on your statuette."
And she called to Rowland to come and be introduced to Mr. Hudson. The young
man sprang up with alacrity, and Rowland, coming forward to shake hands, had a
good look at him in the light projected from the parlor window. Something
seemed to shine out of
"Your
statuette seems to me very good," Rowland said gravely. "It has given
me extreme pleasure."
"And
my cousin knows what is good," said Cecilia. "He 's a connoisseur."
"Pray
do," said Cecilia. "It will keep him a while. He is running off to
"Ah,
to
But the
note seemed to Rowland to be struck rather at random, for he perceived no echo
of it in the boyish garrulity of his later talk.
Rowland,
who was but a moderate talker, sat by in silence, while Cecilia, who had told
him that she desired his opinion upon her friend, used a good deal of
characteristic finesse in leading the young man to expose himself. She
perfectly succeeded, and
"What
are you laughing at?" the young man then demanded. "Have I said
anything so ridiculous?"
"Go
on, go on," Cecilia replied. "You are too delicious! Show Mr. Mallet
how Mr. Striker read the Declaration of Independence."
"I
really meant it," said Rowland, laying a kindly hand on his shoulder.
"It is very good indeed. It is, as you say, essentially good. That is the
beauty of it."
"My
cousin asked me to-day," said Cecilia, "whether I supposed you knew
yourself how good it is."
"Very
likely," said Mallet. "I read in a book the other day that great
talent in action—in fact the book said genius—is a kind of
somnambulism. The artist performs great feats, in a dream. We must not wake him
up, lest he should lose his balance."
"Oh,
when he 's back in bed again!"
"Tell
me this," said Rowland. "Did you mean anything by your young
Water-drinker? Does he represent an idea? Is he a symbol?"
"And
is the cup also a symbol?"
"The
cup is knowledge, pleasure, experience. Anything of that kind!"
"Well,
he 's guzzling in earnest," said Rowland.
"Well,
what do you make of him?" asked Cecilia, returning a short time afterwards
from a visit of investigation as to the sufficiency of Bessie's bedclothes.
"I
confess I like him," said Rowland. "He 's very immature,—but
there 's stuff in him."
"He
's a strange being," said Cecilia, musingly.
"Who
are his people? what has been his education?" Rowland asked.
"He
has had no education, beyond what he has picked up, with little trouble, for
himself. His mother is a widow, of a
"Why,
then," asked Rowland, "does n't he deliberately take up the chisel?"
"For
several reasons. In the first place, I don't think he more than half suspects
his talent. The flame is smouldering, but it is never fanned by the breath of
criticism. He sees nothing, hears nothing, to help him to self-knowledge. He 's
hopelessly discontented, but he does n't know where to look for help. Then his
mother, as she one day confessed to me, has a holy horror of a profession which
consists exclusively, as she supposes, in making figures of people without
their clothes on. Sculpture, to her mind, is an insidious form of immorality,
and for a young man of a passionate disposition she considers the law a much
safer investment. Her father was a judge, she has two brothers at the bar, and
her elder son had made a very promising beginning in the same line. She wishes
the tradition to be perpetuated. I 'm pretty sure the law won't make Roderick's
fortune, and I 'm afraid it will, in the long run, spoil his temper."
"What
sort of a temper is it?"
"One
to be trusted, on the whole. It is quick, but it is generous. I have known it
to breathe flame and fury at ten o'clock in the evening, and soft, sweet music
early on the morrow. It 's a very entertaining temper to observe. I,
fortunately, can do so dispassionately, for I 'm the only person in the place
he has not quarreled with."
"Has
he then no society? Who is Miss Garland, whom you asked about?"
"A
young girl staying with his mother, a sort of far-away cousin; a good plain
girl, but not a person to delight a sculptor's eye. Roderick has a goodly share
of the old Southern arrogance; he has the aristocratic temperament. He will
have nothing to do with the small towns-people; he says they 're 'ignoble.' He
cannot endure his mother's friends—the old ladies and the ministers and
the tea-party people; they bore him to death. So he comes and lounges here and
rails at everything and every one."
This
graceful young scoffer reappeared a couple of evenings later, and confirmed the
friendly feeling he had provoked on Rowland's part. He was in an easier mood
than before, he chattered less extravagantly, and asked Rowland a number of
rather naif questions about the condition of the fine arts in
The young
men walked away at a steady pace, over hill and dale, through woods and fields,
and at last found themselves on a grassy elevation studded with mossy rocks and
red cedars. Just beneath them, in a great shining curve, flowed the goodly
"It
's a wretched business," he said, "this practical quarrel of ours
with our own country, this everlasting impatience to get out of it. Is one's
only safety then in flight? This is an American day, an American landscape, an
American atmosphere. It certainly has its merits, and some day when I am
shivering with ague in classic
Roderick
kindled with a sympathetic glow, and declared that
Rowland
burst out laughing and told him that he liked his practice better than his
theory, and that a saner impulse than this had inspired his little
Water-drinker. Roderick took no offense, and three minutes afterwards was
talking volubly of some humbler theme, but half heeded by his companion, who
had returned to his cogitations. At last Rowland delivered himself of the
upshot of these. "How would you like," he suddenly demanded, "to
go to
"Nay,"
said Rowland soberly, "if you were to go to
"It
will be time to arrange details when I pack my trunk," said
"If
you mean to turn sculptor, the sooner you pack your trunk the better."
"Oh,
but I 'm a practical man! What is the smallest sum per annum, on which one can
keep alive the sacred fire in
"What
is the largest sum at your disposal?"
Roderick
stroked his light moustache, gave it a twist, and then announced with mock
pomposity: "Three hundred dollars!"
"The
money question could be arranged," said Rowland. "There are ways of
raising money."
"I
should like to know a few! I never yet discovered one."
"One
consists," said Rowland, "in having a friend with a good deal more
than he wants, and not being too proud to accept a part of it."
Roderick
stared a moment and his face flushed. "Do you mean—do you
mean?".... he stammered. He was greatly excited.
Rowland
got up, blushing a little, and Roderick sprang to his feet. "In three
words, if you are to be a sculptor, you ought to go to
Roderick
pushed off his hat and wiped his forehead, still gazing at his companion.
"You believe in me!" he cried at last.
"Allow
me to explain," said Rowland. "I believe in you, if you are prepared
to work and to wait, and to struggle, and to exercise a great many virtues. And
then, I 'm afraid to say it, lest I should disturb you more than I should help
you. You must decide for yourself. I simply offer you an opportunity."
"Now?"
"Yes,
we 'll walk home. We 'll settle the question."
He passed
his hand through Rowland's arm and they retraced their steps. They reached the
town and made their way along a broad country street, dusky with the shade of
magnificent elms. Rowland felt his companion's arm trembling in his own. They
stopped at a large white house, flanked with melancholy hemlocks, and passed
through a little front garden, paved with moss-coated bricks and ornamented
with parterres bordered with high box hedges. The mansion had an air of
antiquated dignity, but it had seen its best days, and evidently sheltered a
shrunken household. Mrs. Hudson, Rowland was sure, might be seen in the garden
of a morning, in a white apron and a pair of old gloves, engaged in frugal
horticulture. Roderick's studio was behind, in the basement; a large, empty
room, with the paper peeling off the walls. This represented, in the fashion of
fifty years ago, a series of small fantastic landscapes of a hideous pattern,
and the young sculptor had presumably torn it away in great scraps, in moments
of aesthetic exasperation. On a board in a corner was a heap of clay, and on
the floor, against the wall, stood some dozen medallions, busts, and figures,
in various stages of completion. To exhibit them Roderick had to place them one
by one on the end of a long packing-box, which served as a pedestal. He did so
silently, making no explanations, and looking at them himself with a strange
air of quickened curiosity. Most of the things were portraits; and the three at
which he looked longest were finished busts. One was a colossal head of a
negro, tossed back, defiant, with distended nostrils; one was the portrait of a
young man whom Rowland immediately perceived, by the resemblance, to be his
deceased brother; the last represented a gentleman with a pointed nose, a long,
shaved upper lip, and a tuft on the end of his chin. This was a face peculiarly
unadapted to sculpture; but as a piece of modeling it was the best, and it was
admirable. It reminded Rowland in its homely veracity, its artless artfulness,
of the works of the early Italian Renaissance. On the pedestal was cut the
name—Barnaby Striker, Esq. Rowland remembered that this was the
appellation of the legal luminary from whom his companion had undertaken to
borrow a reflected ray, and although in the bust there was naught flagrantly
set down in malice, it betrayed, comically to one who could relish the secret,
that the features of the original had often been scanned with an irritated eye.
Besides these there were several rough studies of the nude, and two or three
figures of a fanciful kind. The most noticeable (and it had singular beauty) was
a small modeled design for a sepulchral monument; that, evidently, of Stephen
Hudson. The young soldier lay sleeping eternally, with his hand on his sword,
like an old crusader in a Gothic cathedral.
Rowland
made no haste to pronounce; too much depended on his judgment. "Upon my
word," cried
And in
truth, as Rowland looked, he saw they were good. They were youthful, awkward,
and ignorant; the effort, often, was more apparent than the success. But the
effort was signally powerful and intelligent; it seemed to Rowland that it
needed only to let itself go to compass great things. Here and there, too,
success, when grasped, had something masterly. Rowland turned to his companion,
who stood with his hands in his pockets and his hair very much crumpled,
looking at him askance. The light of admiration was in Rowland's eyes, and it
speedily kindled a wonderful illumination on
"I
think I know what that means," Roderick answered. He turned away, threw
himself on a rickety chair, and sat for some moments with his elbows on his
knees and his head in his hands. "Work—work?" he said at last,
looking up, "ah, if I could only begin!" He glanced round the room a
moment and his eye encountered on the mantel-shelf the vivid physiognomy of Mr.
Barnaby Striker. His smile vanished, and he stared at it with an air of
concentrated enmity. "I want to begin," he cried, "and I can't
make a better beginning than this! Good-by, Mr. Striker!" He strode across
the room, seized a mallet that lay at hand, and before Rowland could interfere,
in the interest of art if not of morals, dealt a merciless blow upon Mr.
Striker's skull. The bust cracked into a dozen pieces, which toppled with a
great crash upon the floor. Rowland relished neither the destruction of the
image nor his companion's look in working it, but as he was about to express
his displeasure the door opened and gave passage to a young girl. She came in
with a rapid step and startled face, as if she had been summoned by the noise.
Seeing the heap of shattered clay and the mallet in Roderick's hand, she gave a
cry of horror. Her voice died away when she perceived that Rowland was a
stranger, but she murmured reproachfully, "Why, Roderick, what have you
done?"
Roderick
gave a joyous kick to the shapeless fragments. "I 've driven the
money-changers out of the temple!" he cried.
The traces
retained shape enough to be recognized, and she gave a little moan of pity. She
seemed not to understand the young man's allegory, but yet to feel that it
pointed to some great purpose, which must be an evil one, from being expressed
in such a lawless fashion, and to perceive that Rowland was in some way
accountable for it. She looked at him with a sharp, frank mistrust, and turned
away through the open door. Rowland looked after her with extraordinary
interest.
Early on
the morrow Rowland received a visit from his new friend. Roderick was in a
state of extreme exhilaration, tempered, however, by a certain amount of
righteous wrath. He had had a domestic struggle, but he had remained master of
the situation. He had shaken the dust of Mr. Striker's office from his feet.
"I
had it out last night with my mother," he said. "I dreaded the scene,
for she takes things terribly hard. She does n't scold nor storm, and she does
n't argue nor insist. She sits with her eyes full of tears that never fall, and
looks at me, when I displease her, as if I were a perfect monster of depravity.
And the trouble is that I was born to displease her. She does n't trust me; she
never has and she never will. I don't know what I have done to set her against
me, but ever since I can remember I have been looked at with tears. The trouble
is," he went on, giving a twist to his moustache, "I 've been too
absurdly docile. I 've been sprawling all my days by the maternal fireside, and
my dear mother has grown used to bullying me. I 've made myself cheap! If I 'm
not in my bed by eleven o'clock, the girl is sent out to explore with a
lantern. When I think of it, I fairly despise my amiability. It 's rather a
hard fate, to live like a saint and to pass for a sinner! I should like for six
months to lead Mrs. Hudson the life some fellows lead their mothers!"
"Allow
me to believe," said Rowland, "that you would like nothing of the
sort. If you have been a good boy, don't spoil it by pretending you don't like
it. You have been very happy, I suspect, in spite of your virtues, and there
are worse fates in the world than being loved too well. I have not had the
pleasure of seeing your mother, but I would lay you a wager that that is the
trouble. She is passionately fond of you, and her hopes, like all intense hopes,
keep trembling into fears." Rowland, as he spoke, had an instinctive
vision of how such a beautiful young fellow must be loved by his female
relatives.
Roderick
frowned, and with an impatient gesture, "I do her justice," he cried.
"May she never do me less!" Then after a moment's hesitation, "I
'll tell you the perfect truth," he went on. "I have to fill a double
place. I have to be my brother as well as myself. It 's a good deal to ask of a
man, especially when he has so little talent as I for being what he is not.
When we were both young together I was the curled darling. I had the silver mug
and the biggest piece of pudding, and I stayed in-doors to be kissed by the
ladies while he made mud-pies in the garden and was never missed, of course.
Really, he was worth fifty of me! When he was brought home from
Rowland
was at loss how to receive this account of his friend's domestic circumstances;
it was plaintive, and yet the manner seemed to him over-trenchant. "You
must lose no time in making a masterpiece," he answered; "then with
the proceeds you can give her gas from golden burners."
"So I
have told her; but she only half believes either in masterpiece or in proceeds.
She can see no good in my making statues; they seem to her a snare of the
enemy. She would fain see me all my life tethered to the law, like a browsing
goat to a stake. In that way I 'm in sight. 'It 's a more regular occupation!'
that 's all I can get out of her. A more regular damnation! Is it a fact that
artists, in general, are such wicked men? I never had the pleasure of knowing
one, so I could n't confute her with an example. She had the advantage of me,
because she formerly knew a portrait-painter at
"I 'm
extremely sorry," said Rowland, "to have been the prime cause of so
much suffering. I owe your mother some amends; will it be possible for me to
see her?"
"If
you 'll see her, it will smooth matters vastly; though to tell the truth she
'll need all her courage to face you, for she considers you an agent of the
foul fiend. She does n't see why you should have come here and set me by the
ears: you are made to ruin ingenuous youths and desolate doting mothers. I
leave it to you, personally, to answer these charges. You see, what she can't
forgive—what she 'll not really ever forgive—is your taking me off
to
"And
does Mr. Striker know of your decision?" asked Rowland.
"To a
certainty! Mr. Striker, you must know, is not simply a good-natured attorney,
who lets me dog's-ear his law-books. He's a particular friend and general
adviser. He looks after my mother's property and kindly consents to regard me
as part of it. Our opinions have always been painfully divergent, but I freely
forgive him his zealous attempts to unscrew my head-piece and set it on hind
part before. He never understood me, and it was useless to try to make him. We
speak a different language—we 're made of a different clay. I had a fit
of rage yesterday when I smashed his bust, at the thought of all the bad blood
he had stirred up in me; it did me good, and it 's all over now. I don't hate
him any more; I 'm rather sorry for him. See how you 've improved me! I must
have seemed to him wilfully, wickedly stupid, and I 'm sure he only tolerated
me on account of his great regard for my mother. This morning I grasped the
bull by the horns. I took an armful of law-books that have been gathering the
dust in my room for the last year and a half, and presented myself at the
office. 'Allow me to put these back in their places,' I said. 'I shall never
have need for them more—never more, never more, never more!' 'So you 've
learned everything they contain?' asked Striker, leering over his spectacles.
'Better late than never.' 'I 've learned nothing that you can teach me,' I
cried. 'But I shall tax your patience no longer. I 'm going to be a sculptor. I
'm going to
"I 'm
glad to know you are to see Mr. Striker again," Rowland answered,
correcting a primary inclination to smile. "You certainly owe him a
respectful farewell, even if he has not understood you. I confess you rather
puzzle me. There is another person," he presently added, "whose
opinion as to your new career I should like to know. What does Miss Garland
think?"
"Because,
though I saw her but for a moment yesterday, she struck me as a very
intelligent person, and I am sure she has opinions."
The smile
on Roderick's mobile face passed rapidly into a frown. "Oh, she thinks
what I think!" he answered.
Before the
two young men separated Rowland attempted to give as harmonious a shape as
possible to his companion's scheme. "I have launched you, as I may
say," he said, "and I feel as if I ought to see you into port. I am
older than you and know the world better, and it seems well that we should
voyage a while together. It 's on my conscience that I ought to take you to
Roderick
assented to all this with an air of candid confidence in his friend's wisdom
that outshone the virtue of pledges. "I have no preparations to
make," he said with a smile, raising his arms and letting them fall, as if
to indicate his unencumbered condition. "What I am to take with me I carry
here!" and he tapped his forehead.
"Happy
man!" murmured Rowland with a sigh, thinking of the light stowage, in his
own organism, in the region indicated by Roderick, and of the heavy one in
deposit at his banker's, of bags and boxes.
When his
companion had left him he went in search of Cecilia. She was sitting at work at
a shady window, and welcomed him to a low chintz-covered chair. He sat some
time, thoughtfully snipping tape with her scissors; he expected criticism and
he was preparing a rejoinder. At last he told her of Roderick's decision and of
his own influence in it. Cecilia, besides an extreme surprise, exhibited a certain
fine displeasure at his not having asked her advice.
"What
would you have said, if I had?" he demanded.
"I
would have said in the first place, 'Oh for pity's sake don't carry off the
person in all
"That
in the first five minutes. What would you have said later?"
"That
for a man who is generally averse to meddling, you were suddenly rather
officious."